Anatomy of an iPhone launch

Prior to Announcement:
Small leaks begin to paint the picture of what the iPhone will be.
Internet Reaction:
Holy crap! This thing will do everything ever. MUST HAVE NOW!

Immediately After Announcement:
Jobs unveils the latest iPhone to an adoring crowd.
Internet Reaction:
Why doesn’t it do everything we thought it would? WHY STEVE, WHY?!

Pre-orders Begin:
The iPhone is finally available for pre-order. The demand promptly causes AT&T’s servers to curl up in the fetal position and cry themselves to death.
Internet Reaction:
All the critics who think it doesn’t do enough secretly ding their credit cards for $200. Apple sells hundreds of thousands of phones that won’t even be available for a week or two.

Launch Day:
Apple manufactures millions of iPhones and not surprisingly a few problems pop up with the initial batch. Despite this, and the negative news coverage of the problems, people still line up for days to get their hands on one.
Internet Reaction:
THE IPHONE IS CURSED, DON’T BUY ONE! IT HAS SPOTS! YOU CAN’T USE IT IF YOU ARE LEFT HANDED! OH THE HUMANITY!

Two Weeks After Launch Day:
Apple has sold millions of iPhones in record time and their stock soars to new heights.
Internet Reaction:
99% of the new iPhone owners love the gadget more than their own children.

What should be our takeaway from this yearly process? The internet should just shut up and enjoy its new iPhone.

Comments

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s