“I’m off to the salt mines!” I yelled as I always do and began the 20-foot walk from the kitchen to my office.

“That’s the problem,” Rebecca said, “You always go to the salt mine. Maybe you need to try the diamond mine.”

I’m not sure why, but this note Cody wrote to Santa and placed under our tree makes me profoundly sad this morning. Maybe it’s the realization that my kids are growing up too quickly and I feel like I’m missing large portions of it. Maybe it’s the bittersweet thought that I get to watch my kids grow up while many others do not after last week’s events.

Regardless there is something magical about childhood innocence. As I’m learning with Colton, our 12-year-old, kids eventually hit a point where you just want them to grow up. Until then, though, I’m just going to enjoy Cody’s hope that he’s “not on the noty list” and not think about the fact that he won’t have many more years of notes like this.

Don’t worry, buddy, you’re definitely on the “nis list”.

I used to love politics and I think there are two reasons I soured on them. One, I discovered that inevitably whomever we elect will be a massive disappointment, continue to spend too much money and work within a deeply flawed system. Two, I became sick of watching perfectly normal people who I tend to like put their hope in sinful men. Any man who runs for election is not our ultimate hope. God decides who rules and reigns temporarily on this earth because He rules and reigns eternally.

There are three things in my life that truly matter to me.

Leading and loving my family well
The man in charge at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue has absolutely no bearing on this. How I love my family and how I lead them is up to me.

To love those around me
God has put a great many people in my life that I am called to love and serve. I live my life to show them grace, help where I can, and walk with them, all in the hope that Christ will impact their lives in a way that undeniably glorifies Him and points them toward our great God and King. Again, no law, decision or idea coming out of Washington will ever impact me helping those around me.

To work hard and grow my business
This is the one where the president can have a slight impact. The amount of taxes I pay and other restrictions will effect the growth rate of my business, but not the eventual destination, which is success. I’m not going to lie, the last two years have been the best my business has ever experienced and gives me great hope for the future. I don’t give President Obama credit for my success any more than I would fault him had I failed. My business will live or die on the back of my hard work and determination. I am more determined than ever to make it work, despite anything the government might ever do, not because of it.

Did I vote for Obama? No. Would I have rather seen Romney in the White House? That’s a yes, but not by much. I’m not one who believes the other side of the aisle is inherently evil. I think they do what they believe is right based on their current set of motivations. Can those motivations be sinful and wrong? Sure, but so are all of ours sometimes. I think it does us all a huge disservice to just assume that everyone who disagrees with us is ignorant or evil. They are humans in need to love and grace, just like you and I.

I respect President Obama for the great calling and burden God has put on his life as President. To lead a few is a massive weight. To lead the free world…I can only imagine.

So, to all my conservative friends, keep calm and move along. What are the most important things in your life, and are they really any different today than the were yesterday? And who do you really look to for your hope?

I leave you with Daniel 2:21: “He changes times and seasons; he removes kings and sets up kings; he gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding; he reveals deep and hidden things; he knows what is in the darkness, and the light dwells with him.“

Which means that our comfort comes not from the powerlessness of our enemies, but from our Father’s sovereign rule over their power. This is the point of Romans 8:25–37. Tribulation and distress and persecution and famine and nakedness and danger and sword cannot separate us from Christ because “in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us” (Romans 8:35–37).

This is where a faith in God’s complete sovereignty has really relieved a lot of my previous worry. Things will occasionally go bad, but none of those things is ever outside of God’s control, which makes them ultimately for my good. It’s faith in the power of God to finish His redemption plan that gives me hope that even a sinner like me will make it.

Complete a to-do item, check Twitter.

Finish a call, check Facebook.

Wrap up a project, play Angry Birds.

Now in place of all those things it’s take a few minutes to pray, read the Bible or any of the other five theology and ministry books I’m in the middle of. It took a few days to calm my brain down and have it realize it doesn’t have to be stimulated by something new every 30 seconds. I think it also serves to lower my stress level in general.

It’s amazing how those things that ate up so much of my time now appear lifeless and dim to my vision.

For whatever reason I can’t sleep.

32 years down.

I wonder what God has for me in the next one.

And for all that, all we have to do is work hard. Used to it was working 40 hours a week. Now it’s 60. We’re always chasing.

More.

Newer.

Better.

Faster.

All of it based on “I can do it.” My struggle this July 4th is my understanding of the gospel which says I can’t do it. I can’t run fast enough to outpace my sin. I can’t work hard enough to be justified. I can’t buy enough stuff to fill that hole in my soul.

I can’t.

And yet I try. I run and work and buy. And sometimes, through God’s grace, I achieve. The joy of success floods over me but like every wave that has ever crashed on the shore, it fades. It doesn’t last. That’s the dirty secret of the American dream. Not only does it not last, it doesn’t satisfy.

So then why? Men and women have sacrificed their lives so that I might be free. Free to run and work and buy, but I want more. God put me here in this time and place. It has to be for more than just that. Look across the globe at the suffering and sorrow in some countries. There are places where people are ripped from their homes and killed for what they believe. There are places where food is so scarce people go days or weeks without a real meal. But God placed me in a place of physical safety and comfort.

And in some ways I think God placed me in a place more dangerous than all of those. How easy is it here for my soul to wander? How easy is it for me to fool myself into thinking I can do it and I don’t need God? We don’t live in a place of great physical danger, but we do live in a place where we can be sucked in by shiny things that won’t satisfy. We live in a place where we are constantly chasing but told to chase the wrong things. We live in a place where we’re increasingly okay with that. We know these things won’t satisfy, but we continue to chase.

Anyone who knows anything about Spider-Man knows the great line that changed his life: “With great power comes great responsibility.” God did put me here in this time and place. He put me in a place of abundant resources and technology. And it isn’t just to terminate on my temporary joy. My joy is the end goal, but not temporary or perishable.

This 4th of July, I’ll cook something outside, enjoy a cold Coca-Cola (from a glass bottle), watch Jaws, see fireworks and hug my children. I’ll be thankful for all those who have sacrificed so that those things can happen. And I pray I don’t waste those sacrifices on the shiny lure of the American dream.

I can’t do it.

He can.

We survived the long stretch of the spring baseball season, only to enter summer, which has somehow been just as busy. Cody and Colton’s teams both finished somewhere at the back of the pack, but they both had fun and learned a lot. Conner’s made a run at the championship and ended up in third place. It was the most fun I’ve ever had on the baseball field.

Since joining Life Church in February, we’ve once again become sucked into ministry which seems to eat a substantial amount of time. More so than actual church work though, we’re spending a lot of time really getting to know people we’re doing life with. It’s honestly something I’ve never been good at, but I’m learning.

My business continues to grow and branch out. Not as quickly as last year, but still growing, slowly but surely. Always with me at the helm, questioning everything we do all the time. Does that ever stop? That uncertainty that comes, not only with developing a business, but with knowing the decisions I make help or hurt the future of my family. It’s the odd position of always having to be sure of what you are doing, but never actually being sure.

In a few weeks I get to preach on the Gospel. All the study that goes into that has me examining my life to see all the places where the Gospel of Jesus really doesn’t have a hold. It’s a process of God prying my fingers off the things I want to control. It’s a battle He is winning, and I’m thankful for that. The transformative work of Christ is by no means easy or even fun, but I can see changes for the better.

Maybe that’s the source of my introspection this hot July evening. Maybe it’s my impending 32nd birthday. I tell myself I’ve accomplished a lot in my 32 years but the other side of my brain knows I probably could have done more, made better decisions here and there. But my deep-seeded theology about the sovereignty of God tells me I had to make every decisions the way I made it. He has been very gracious in my life and I should be more thankful for that.

As a rule, getting older doesn’t bother me. A big part of me relishes the idea of being in my sixties or seventies and really enjoying the wisdom of age along with finally having an excuse for my cantankerous nature. But, every so often, I have the occasional day when I acknowledge that I am getting older. My kids are growing rapidly and before I know it will be out of the house. I tell myself I’m looking forward to that day so Becca and I can start a different chapter in our lives, but I know the day one of the kids leaves my house I’ll be devastated.

God has blessed us with some of the most amazing friends in the world. Tomorrow night they will descend on our house for hamburgers (hopefully), margaritas (definitely) and swimming. We’ll swim and splash with our kids. We’ll relish the fact that their oldest just had his cast removed and is on the way to recovery. We’ll stay up entirely too late and talk. We’ll probably spend a lot of time dreaming about the future of the people God has entrusted us to care for in the church. And in that time I’ll take a moment and thank God for all he has done and I’ll forget that I’m about to turn 32 and anything else that’s bothering me.

But for now I get to be quiet and introspective and listen.

And that’s okay every once in a while.

Interesting.

Via Logo Design Love.

Now I have.

Often through my life I’ve worked on the big picture at the churches I’ve been at. Despite working in the trenches, my love and focus was really on the overall direction things were headed. People weren’t people. They were Sunday stats, demographics and groups. It happens because that’s how a big part of my brain is wired.

What I learned Sunday, as the Texas heat radiated up from the parking lot, was that there is an intimate view of the church to be had from the parking lot. I was able to welcome every person there that day. People were no longer groups. Suddenly it wasn’t about the total number of people we could serve on Easter. It was about each individual family. Each person who had decided to come to Life Church on Sunday.

I saw members who knew what to do and where to go. I saw families who had clearly fought all the way to church. I saw new visitors who just wanted to know the quickest way in because of the nervousness that comes with visiting a new place for the first time. I saw faces. Individual faces.

We worked for weeks prepping for Easter, often with our eyes on the big picture. On Sunday, in that hot parking lot with a bright yellow vest on, the big picture came into focus. It was made up of a group of people, some new, some old, but all family.

If you’ve never worked the parking lot, volunteer to wear the yellow vest, at least for one week. There’s a lot of value there. It might just change the way you look at the big picture.

I really notice the difference when I don’t get up early. Yesterday morning I didn’t get up until 7:15. The entire day felt like I was under the gun. I was constantly running and my stress level was just higher.

Getting up early seems to lead to less stressful days for me and allows more creativity. Granted, I have to be in bed by 10:00PM at the latest, but that’s a fair tradeoff for more productivity and less stress. It’s been one of the best changes I’ve ever made.

Spend five minutes watching this, then let’s dream about what the future could be.

Even nine-year-olds can tell when you aren’t the real deal.

“I’m sure there are,” she said.

“Yeah,” Cody said, “Like Fruity Pebbles.”

What would that goal look like if you spent 30 minutes a day on it?

Just 30 minutes. Over the course of a year that adds up to over seven and a half days. Over a week of completely uninterrupted work. 182.5 hours. That’s a lot of production when focused on one thing.

For me, it’s writing. What is it for you?

Every February 1st: “Well crap.”

I’ve learned not to do New Year’s resolutions. Usually when they are drafted, I’m filled with so much hope. I’m generally coming off a few days rest between Christmas and New Year’s day. I’m optimistic the next year will be different.

I fail to ask why it will be different. It won’t be different on its own. You see, and this may come as a bit of a shock, there is nothing magical about January. Nothing.

That’s why New Year’s resolutions never work. We don’t take steps ahead of time and plan to do the things required to be different. 2011 was very different for me because I had a plan well before January 1st. This year is the same. I have some lofty goals for 2012. I started working on those goals months ago.

Am I going to lose weight this year? Yes.

Am I going to make more money this year? Yes.

Am I going to spend more time with my family this year? Yes.

But only because these are more than just goals. These are fully realized plans I’ve been working on for a while. I figure if you aren’t several steps down the road to completing your plan by January 1st, it probably won’t be any different by December 31st.

But maybe that’s just me. Maybe everyone else always achieves their New Year’s resolutions…

We were really blessed in 2011. I’m thankful for that and hope 2012 will be just as much fun.

My prayer for you is that however 2011 went, the next year will be even better.

Waiting and tapping.

Everyone is silently tapping away on a phone. Reading. Sending email. Hurling ill-tempered birds to their death. I’m even writing this on my phone.

What did we ever do before our brains could be constantly engaged? What did we do in those moments between moments? Waiting in the doctor’s office. Waiting on food to arrive. What happened back when our brains were forced to just relax for a moment or focus on something other than this glowing thing in our hands?

I wonder about the effect these things have on our brain because much of what I do comes from some deep recess of my mind, and it’s kind of mysterious. I’d hate to do anything that would mess with that. Creativity is not math. It is not this quantifiable thing that is easy to understand on paper. People present me with problems and I design solutions. Most of the solutions come to me at odd times in odd places. Usually it’s not while I’m sitting and thinking about the problem.

How many things am I missing by not letting my brain just rest and disengage in those moments between moments? Could my phone, this vaunted scion of productivity, actually be hurting my creative output?

“What rumor?”

“The rumor is that parents buy all the presents and put them out. Santa is just a homeless man parents hire to come in and eat the cookies on Christmas night. Is that true?”

Watch it until the end.

Two weeks ago I upgraded from Creative Suite 3 to Creative Suite 5.5. That was an $840 upgrade. I ordered the boxed version. Unfortunately when you order that, you don’t get the serial numbers until they arrive. Of course, my 30-day trial of the new software had just expired that day. So basically I would be without the main software I use for a few days. That’s not possible with our schedule right now.

So I call Adobe customer support, conveniently located in another country, and asked if I could cancel that order and just order the download version to get the serial number immediately.

“Of course,” the guy says, “The old order is canceled, was not charged to your account and now you may order the new one.”

So I order the download copy. Fast forward a day later and I get an email to let me know my boxed copy had shipped. I check my account and sure enough I have been charged $840 twice. I’m not sure about you, but that’s a little more than inconvenient for me.

I call Adobe support again, also, still conveniently located in another country.

“Sorry, sir, I canceled it in one of our systems, but not both, so it went through anyway.”

“Obviously,” I say, trying to keep my irritation under control, “But, I’d like my money back now.”

“Sorry, sir, you have to wait until you get the boxed copy, call us back with the serial number so we can cancel it, then wait 3-5 days.”

“That’s unacceptable,” I say, “I need the money back now. You guys screwed up and I shouldn’t have to pay for it.”

“I can upgrade this to a Tier 2 support status and you’ll get a call from a Tier 2 representative. They might be able to help.”

“Fine.”

Fast forward a few hours. The phone rings. “Hello, sir. This call is to let you know your case has been escalated to a Tier 2 level and you will receive a call tomorrow morning from a representative.”

“Seriously?” I ask.

“Yes, sir.”

“Fine.”

Fast forward to the next morning. No call.

Fast forward to the next afternoon. The box arrives. I call with the serial number.

“Thanks for the call, sir. Your refund will now be expedited in 3 to 5 days.”

I wait 7 business days. Still no refund. I call back today.

“Sorry sir, we forgot to generate a something something report. We’re doing that now and you will get your refund in 3 to 5 days.”

“Since you guys screwed up again, I’d like it faster. Let me speak with your boss.”

Fast forward another 20 minutes.

“Hi, I’m a supervisor.”

“Hi, I’d like my refund faster than 3 to 5 days.”

“3 to 5 days? We can only do 5 to 7 days.”

“Wait, what? But the last guy said 3 to 5 days.”

“Did he give you a 100% guarantee?”

“What the hell is wrong with your company?”

“Nothing, sir, I assure you.”

“Must just be the people then.”

So I sit on hold for hours now through this process. My blood pressure is through the roof every time I speak with them. I don’t normally cuss or yell. I’ve cussed and yelled. And I still don’t have my $840.

I guess we will see if it ever happens.

UPDATE: This was e-mailed to me letting me know they had closed my case (for the third time): “Your credit card will be refunded within ten business days. Your issuing bank often requires an additional two to three weeks to apply the credit to your account.”

Really?

“What?” I asked.

“You and Mom are the best parents.”

“That’s sweet. Thank you.”

“Yeah,” he continued, “You get us the best birthday presents….and Christmas presents.”

“Oh,” I said, “So if we didn’t get you any of those presents would we still be the best parents?”

He gave me a look like I was talking crazy, then he pondered it for a moment. “Well,” he said finally, “If that happened, you’d be just kind of in the middle.”

Quality parenting can, apparently, be purchased.

“Seven would make me happy,” I said, “But eight at the absolute latest. Worst case scenario, we have to leave by eight. If one of the kids spontaneously bursts into flames and the other two are running around naked, we still leave by eight.”

“Flames, huh?”

“Flames. Eight ‘o clock.”

“Okay.”

This reminds me of all the businesses in the world that brag about being the best quality. Only about 10% of those really are best quality. The other 90% are either ignorant or just plain lying about it.

You shouldn’t have to say you’re the best quality. It should just be obvious to everyone who ever deals with you.

We have an iPad but not an iPad 2. Do you recommend upgrading or do the new features not justify the cost? — Sarah

For me, the answer is no.* We own an original iPad. I’ve been contemplating getting another for my own personal use. Ours is for the family, which means every time I pick it up, I find jelly or some such on it. I’d really rather have my own. That being said, I’m holding out for an iPad 3.

I’ve spent time with the iPad 2 and it’s a very impressive device. Much lighter than the original, and noticeably snappier. Unfortunately other than that, there wasn’t much that I’d place in the “have to have” category if we’re talking upgrade. I’m sure FaceTime is nice, but I have it on my phone and have used it maybe twice.

Now, if you don’t have a tablet at all, of course, go iPad 2. As far as an upgrade though, it just wasn’t compelling enough for me.

*I guess it also depends on what kind of person you are when it comes to technology. You wouldn’t know it by the amount of Apple techno-crap I own, but I’m not usually the “gotta-have-it-on-launch-day guy.” I usually buy the most expensive computer I can and then use it for four or five years. I never upgrade software if I don’t have to. I get a new iPhone every couple of years, but usually don’t feel the itch to upgrade yearly. Overall, I’d say I’m very patient when it comes to buying new technology. Some people aren’t like that, so factor your personality into your upgrade decision.

The Bucs’ linebacker coach, Joe Baker, admitted he was “a little skeptical” when the team started using iPads. His concerns were rooted in a past experience, when another team he worked for started using laptops. At the time, he said, it was a poor integration of technology and the team’s needs. Today, he admits things have changed.

“To have all that information at your fingertips accessible and convenient,” said Baker. “It’s a godsend.”

The form factor and user interface of the iPad are just so intuitive it has opened doors and is being used in ways a laptop never could. The ease-of-use on an iPad can never be discounted. The information the team needs is literally at their fingertips.

Quote via CNN.

Last year around this time I took a few months off from posting on Twitter and Facebook. It was so nice. I found the desire to write more long-form entries here on the blog and generally just felt more relaxed. It was like taking a breather after running for hours. I discovered that I had begun to think in 140-character snippets. Everything that I saw or experienced, my brain dutifully composed in my head as a tweet. My fingers would then, also dutifully, type that message into Twitter. It’s annoying, not only in my head, but probably to the world that reads those sometimes inane tweets.

As a result of that time away, I’ve used Twitter far, far less in 2011. Coincidentally, we’ve done an order of magnitude more business this year than last. Interesting.

As my stress level has steadily risen I decided to take the last few months off again. One week into that sabbatical, I noticed something different this time. I’m training my brain to think long form again, but I also miss Twitter a bit in one way: it’s actually useful. Several times I’ve wanted to ask a question on Twitter and stopped myself. But there are sometimes friendly people out there who like answering questions.

As with everything, it’s all about balance. I guess there’s nothing wrong with using Twitter for genuinely useful communication. I can use it when I need it. So now “taking off” means not posting every thought I ever have. It’s refreshing, and after just one week, I’ve found a renewed desire to write again. For a good chunk of the year I figured my not writing was because of having too much going on creatively. In the past week I’ve actually had to do more creative work than usual and yet still feel the desire to write. I still subscribe to the theory that I only have so many well-written words to give in a day. If I give a large portion of those to Twitter and Facebook, I rob my other endeavors.

It makes me wonder if I’ll use tools like Twitter even less next year. Probably so. I need to treat it as just that, a tool, and not a place for everything that sails between my ears.

If you’re not already using Pinterest, you probably should be. I’ve started using it as an archive for all the interesting things (especially creative) that I find on the internet. Here’s the things that have caught my attention.